Todays Lesson

Stealing

 

The most unusual thing I ever stole? A snowman. 
Midnight. He looked magnificent; a tall, white mute
beneath the winter moon. I wanted him, a mate
with a mind as cold as the slice of ice
within my own brain. I started with the head. 

Better off dead than giving in, not taking
what you want. He weighed a ton; his torso, 
frozen stiff, hugged to my chest, a fierce chill
piercing my gut. Part of the thrill was knowing
that children would cry in the morning. Life’s tough.

Sometimes I steal things I don’t need. I joy-ride cars
to nowhere, break into houses just to have a look. 
I’m a mucky ghost, leave a mess, maybe pinch a camera. 
I watch my gloved hand twisting the doorknob.
A stranger’s bedroom. Mirrors. I sigh like this – Aah.

It took some time. Reassembled in the yard,
he didn’t look the same. I took a run
and booted him. Again. Again. My breath ripped out
in rags. It seems daft now. Then I was standing
alone among lumps of snow, sick of the world. 

Boredom. Mostly I’m so bored I could eat myself. 
One time, I stole a guitar and thought I might
learn to play. I nicked a bust of Shakespeare once, 
flogged it, but the snowman was the strangest. 
You don’t understand a word I’m saying, do you?

 

Death/Nature/Love/War/Memory/Time

 

Memory – The poem establishes the sentiment of memory. The poet explores the concept of mental representation of an event or action.

 

Death – The poet investigates the ideas of death into this poet by giving it a sense of anonymity. 

3 things I learnt from last lesson

1. Instead of using the first word that comes into my head, try and explore better words with the same meanings.

2. Describe a text as if it is DOING something, rather then just describe the words on a page.

3. Read a lot. 

What are the most important things, for me, to take out of Mr B’s Farewell Fun Pack’

 

1. You don’t use the first word that comes into your head; you realise hat language is rich and that we make choices about whether to say “the big event” or the “major / significant / momentous / important / groundbreaking / event” based on context and audience

Continually I just think of a word to use and then just put it down on paper. For Example, if I were going to say take out, I could use extract as well. This change may only be minute but it could be the difference between two marks.

2. Be able to write confident, rich prose which draws the reader in, making us wonder quite which word will happen next

With my writing I need to improve on making the piece I’m writing seem like I want to write it rather then I have to write it. This would make the reader more interested and make them want to know what is going to happen next.

3. Be able to judge the audience and genre, and write in a style that is appropriate

In some of my writing I may write a comprehensive or an essay in a too simplistic way, this would automatically make the reader disinterested.

4. Enjoy the feeling of being able to interpret the world (through reading) and express viewpoints (through writing)

Even though I do love reading, when it comes to writing it seems like more of a task then an enjoyable activity. If I stop thinking about it as if I HAVE to do it then it would become more interesting for the reader, but also for me.

5. Question a text.

If I start to question text it would automatically make the text easier to understand. For example, I need to decipher whether it is formal or informal, because this would change the whole context of the text.

How to get an A* in English

In this post I will extract 5 of the key points in ‘Mr B’s Farewell Fun Pack’ – http://geoffbarton.co.uk/files/student-resources/GCSE-A*/A*-Farewell-fun-pack.pdf

1. The opening paragraph of the booklet is:

If you’re talented, you shouldn’t see getting an A* as a bonus – something that’s 
just happened and taken you beyond an A. You should have a determination to 
get one, since it ranks you in the top 10% of English students in England.

This automatically makes the reader aspire to achieve the A grade and will go the extra mile for it.

2. My second most important point in this booklet is:

You don’t use the first word that comes into your head; you realise hat 
language is rich and that we make choices about whether to say “the big 
event” or the “major / significant / momentous / important / groundbreaking / event” based on context and audience.

If you follow this pint then your writing will be more advanced, a better read and will help you impress the reader.

3. Exploit what the text is about, rather then just saying what it is.

This is a really good point that it makes as it will help the reader of your exam feel consumed in your writing, rather then just reading it.

4. What is the text designed to do.

When you are reading a question or a text, try and question it, a good example of this is Hegel’s Synthesis. This is where you think of an academic thesis, and then you have to look at the opposition of that, and out of that you can create your synthesis.

5. Read a lot.

This point is the most important thing out of the booklet that the reader can take away. Even though it looks like a simple statement, it can make the difference between a B and C grade and an A and A*. All of English is based around vocabulary, and if you have no vocabulary then English could be very hard. This is the reason that reading is essential.

Racism in Sport

Never have we been so aware, yet never has it been more present. Why is Racism still here after all the struggle we have been through? On the 3rd of January Kevin-Prince Boateng walked off the pitch because he was getting racially abused by a section of the crowd. Was it the right thing to do? Yes it was, because somebody is finally making a stand to racism which should have been kicked out of football years ago. The same thing is happening around the world. For example: Drogba in turkey, Ballotelli in Italy, and even at the PFA Player of the Year ceremony, Reginald D Hunter made some racially abusing remarks towards black footballers. However a minority people don’t share the same view, Sepp Blatter, Head of Fifa, said that Boateng ‘was running away from his problems’. I think this is a horrific thing to say. Plainly, Racism is wrong, racism is disrespectful and racism is fundamentally evil. This is why I think we should, collectively, kick racism out of football. 

Our Lesson Today – Fact/Opinion & Formal/Informal

In today’s lesson we started to look at the the structure of paragraphs and decipher whether it is a formal paragraph or a informal paragraph, furthermore we looked if it was fatual or opinionated. 

I contracted polio when I was two years old. I don’t remember it. But I do remember my parents telling me about the advice that the doctor gave when it was time to take me from the hospital. He told them, “Just put her in bed. She’s going to be staying there the rest of her life.”

This paragraph is written in the style of an informal manner. The writer’s choice of vocabulary emphasises that he is addressing the reader in colloquial way. The writer uses anecdotes to show the reader a vivid image of what it was like for the writer. Furthermore, the writer uses personal pronouns to show that the text is personable. Lastly the writer uses the connectives like, ‘I’ and ‘But’ to show that the writer is talking in an informal, almost chatty way.

There was a double eclipse in the early autumn of 1605 – a lunar eclipse on 19 September followed by an eclipse of the sun in early October. Such celestial phenomena were traditional held to ‘portend no good’.

This piece is factual. We know this because the writer uses a verity of facts and datesFor example, the writer suggests that there was a ‘…lunar eclipse on 19 September’. Furthermore, the writer does not use personal pronouns, which gives us a sense of anonymity. These two points gives it a sense of a factually based text, rather then a opinionated text.

 

The Road Not Taken – By Robert Frost

I chose the poem ‘the Road Not Taken’ because it explores the ideas of how, in life, you have to make choices. The easy one or the hard one ‘the one less traveled by’. I really enjoyed this poem because it lets you think of all the possible choices in life that you make and makes you question if it was the right choice. My favourite line from it is the last few. Robert Frost dictates: ‘ I…I took the one less travelled by, and that has made all the difference’. This is a powerful phrase because it shows the reader that, in life, you don’t always have to do what everyone else is doing, and you are entitled to your own opinion.

Lypsyl Advertisement

This week we looked at presentational devices, here is my work:

This article portrays many types of presentational devices, ranging from different font colours and sizes to pictures and cameos. Firstly I would like to look at the title. Lypsyl use bright and vibrant colours to show that this is not serious advertisement and should not be taken to sincerely. They also use different fonts to try and appeal to teenagers and create an eye-catching effect on the reader. The pink writing on the yellow background brings it the points trying to be portrayed and gives a strong visual impact on the reader. Furthermore the caption ‘Win!’ in the top left of the advertisement automatically triggers a desire to find out more about the competition, therefore making the onlooker read more. However as it is obviously not that easy to win the contest, there are some implications that they must include for legal purposes. So Lypsyl put all of the legal text in the bottom right in a yellow text box with orange writing, therefore drawing the readers attention away as they cannot see it clearly. In the large picture there are two teenage girls shopping, this automatically catches the attention of the desired crowds, teenage girls. Lastly the arranged pattern of the Lypsyl products is all different colours which is following on the effect of bright vivid colours. However it also shows the girls that the product comes in lots of different types and would suit any type of teenage girl.

In conclusion this advertisement is very stereotypical, it is targeting a teenage girl audience therefore it uses bright pink colours and pictures of girls shopping. However this does make the advertisement very powerful as it gives a clear message to the audience that it wants to attract.

 

Comments on my work:

Good no obvious mistakes and well punctuated. I think it was a creative piece of writing as he looked at it from a different than what would have been expected. He clearly explained the use of the presentational devices in the advert and what effect they created. Mostly his phrases were well put together but some could have been structures in a more clear and concise way. A

His spelling and punctuation is all correct and there is nothing to fault. I did feel that it was very creative and original but there are a few phrases which does not make 100% sense and some of the phrases are quite repetitive. Elliott did discuss all of the effects of the presentational devices that he spotted. Most of the phrases made sense but, he missed out a few words in some sentences which doesn’t make complete sense. B

His spelling is very accurate and I could not find any problems in it. His punctuation is also good.  Eliot’s piece was good and accurate but it did not actually bring that much we I hadn’t heard before and it didn’t add detail to previous ideas in all cases. Eliot analyses effect in places but occasionally he does not think to go into more detail so that we know what kind of impression it is making on the reader and such like. Eliot’s phrasing was accurate and worked in all places. The only thing I would say is that sometimes there would have been a better phrase to use in a certain position or perhaps to link to sentences rather than have two short and simple ones. B+

Three things I need to improve on:

1. Expand on my ideas, try and give a clearer understanding of what points I am trying to describe.

2. Have original ideas, try to think about the deeper meaning behind the devices used.

3. Try and use suitable vocabulary so that my points make sense.

 

 

Todays lesson: Level 7 phrases

Today we looked at useful phrases that coud help us achieve a level 7 standard of writing. We took the first page of George Orwell’s book ‘1984’, and applied the phrases that we had been revising in the lesson into practice. All the phrases that we created are ones that we must use in our writing if we are going to achieve a high grade at GCSE or even A Levels. I found this lesson really useful because I have been struggling with structuring my answers to questions and this lesson has showed me that if I learn a few short phrases/clauses it could turn my work from a Level 5 to a Level 7.

Level 7 phrases: 1984

1st Paragraph:
In this extract, the writer employs/utilises (uses) a range of devices to create a powerful impact on the reader such as… imagery/vivid imagery, metaphors and juxtaposition.
In the first page the writer portrays the fact that you are being observed at all times.
In this extract, the writer employs a range of devices to create a powerful impact on the reader such as vivid imagery, metaphors and juxtaposition. This extract interrogates the notion that there is no such thing as individual thought and that we are always under oppressive surveillance in modern society.
2nd Paragraph:
In terms of language, the writer makes a series of significant word choices to establish a powerful mood. The choice of word ‘_____’ is significant as it creates a sense of _____. Furthermore, the word _____ increases this sense of _____ and indicates that…
Better ways of saying ‘this increases…’:
-This increases the sense of…
-This emphasises the sense of…
-This accentuates the sense of…
3rd Paragraph:
Another technique/device to consider is the writer’s use of metaphorical language. (figurative language)
NEVER use ‘this creates tension’ rather say:
-This creates an overall atmosphere of fear/sadness etc.
-This metaphor forces the reader to consider what life was like in…
-This metaphor evokes a feeling of…
-This phrase engenders a sense of…